Why am I the one.

"For once, I get the feeling that I'm right where I belong
So, Why am I the one always packing up my stuff?"

 I've come to the really sad conclusion that I'll just never be accepted, and no not in the "I really need to fit in!" or "I just wanna be cool" sort of stupidity. I mean, I have some pretty great friends, and I really like them, and they're not even judgmental or anything, but it's really just me. I'm really weird. It's not even the kind of weird you appreciate in a person, it's just the kind of weird where you instinctively cringe away from.

Now, don't get me wrong or anything I'm not saying I'm the only person who suffers with this problem, you know? and I'm not even pitying myself, really I'm just in a strange way coming to terms with this fact. But Honestly, what can you do? Even if others don't accept you, does it matter? I mean sure, there's a void there that you're missing, but I guess once you get passed it and just focus on you that's all that counts.

I guess most of the reason that I hate being social and stuff is that I'm just so bad at it. I can't even be social around people I'm comfortable with. I use the term comfortable very, very loosely. I try and talk about things that I think can be semi-relatable and it just makes me look crazy, but I guess that things that make me weird aren't very understandable things, but again this is my own fault anyhow.

I really just wanted to tell someone this, because I feel a lot better now that this is out.
Thank you for your time. 

-MissVonHusen

Be Calm.

"Can't you see, I'm losing my mind this time?
This time I think it's for real."

Okay so. Bleh. I've been super duper busy lately, but finally my life is slowing down, and I'm beginning to remember what sanity feels like.
I hope.
So I really wanted to share about this project I was assigned in my German class.
Basically, it's a family tree and she said we were allowed to make a "Dream Family" naturally I jumped at this opportunity to be as ridiculous and strange as possible.
Let me explain:
First of all my grandparents are "Creation" and " The Blood of Christ" and my great uncle is "Kenneth Fox". (by request, and genie wish.)  Now, after that, my grandparents came together to create "Unleavened Bread" who married "The Universe"and then in turn, they created "Rachel von Husen" Now, once I grew up I married "God" (featuring a picture of Bob Dylan) and we had two Children:  "Judas Iscariot" and "Jesus". Now, Jesus grew up to marry "Mary Magdalene" and they had the lovely "Simon". "Judas" went on to Marry "Johanna from my German Class" and they had the scary thing known as " King Herod" (The only person in Jesus Christ Super Star[1973] who should have been required to wear a shirt). and naturally there is a hairless cat named "Georg" (pronounced Gay-org) and "Manfred" who is another person in my German class.
I don't blame you if you never talk to me again after I share this with you.
I can't tell if this is awful and sacrilegious or merely entertaining. (at least to me anyway)
The funny thing is that I think I might maybe possibly believe all this god stuff.
But I honestly don't know, I just don't.
DON'T CROWD ME OKAY.
Ugh, I'll never get that music out of my head. Maybe it's the inspiration for this whole project.
in fact I can't stop listening to it.
my brain is forever tuned to JCS.
I JUST WANT IT OUT BWRARARARARARARA.
Oh my god.
What am I.
okay bye.

-MissVonHusen

Could We Start Again Please?

"Now for the first time, I think we're going wrong." 

What is blogging.
Honestly.
I don't even remember what the hell I made this thing for.
Did I find it entertaining? Was that it?
The only thing I remember about blogging was how everyone just fought about how everyone's blogs were "copying" the others
Was that really all that fun?
I remember we'd all play this dumb game of who could guess the number of the person I'm writing about.
I never once did that, but I can say I secretly blogged about a few people.
I could tell you but I mean, honestly do you care?
Does anyone really care about petty things like that anymore?
I've got better things to worry about then if the person I'm blogging about is reading it and understanding the message I'm trying to portray to them.
Hell I could just tell them in person if I wanted to.
But look how cynical I was before.
Was I really that cynical? I mean I'm sitting here now wondering about my life. What happened since the last time I blogged. I mean, I never thought I'd have a steady relationship, I honestly thought I'd be living with cats for the rest of my life, but look at where I am now. I'm in a very happy relationship, with someone I am extremely fond of,  I honestly couldn't even dream of a cat being better than him.
Look at where I am in my music.I never dreamed I'd go to all state, but look, that just finished too. Extremely successful, as well.
I'm also like some sort of social misfit. I guess I've always been, but now I have anti-social friends too.
Weird as that is.
but I guess this is my introduction.
Welcome back to my life Blogger.

-MissVonHusen